I just watched charlieissocoollike’s now nearly 5 year old video after five years, and for the second time in these five years. Video in question being this one-Dear Future Charlie
I vaguely remember watching it back then. I don’t think I made as much of it as I did just now. This time, I cried. Literally. Teared up. Perplexing as this might be, I think, it is because for the first time, my own future is SO unimaginably uncertain. I don’t know, I considered making a time capsule of sorts of my own, on video and written formats. But I couldn’t decide where to put it. I also needed to compose self. Maybe I will make a video, maybe I won’t. But I’m finding not knowing what is going to become of me very stressful and scary. He told his future self that he hopes he’d still be doing YouTube in some form. So he is in fact able to accept that he might be doing something entirely different! But given that I went down the particular career path that I did, I really do doubt that doing anything else will be an option ever in my life. I’m not sure I’d want to do anything else for a living, but time and again I have wished I’d done something- anything else, so I’d have been able to do theatre, maybe song more, blog more, write more.
Anyway, if I do muster the stuff required to make a video and put it up on YouTube even if it is privated, or maybe store it on my Google drive maybe, I’ll put it on here as well. My own personal little Internet diary🙂